


Only a Collar Left

by aguacate



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Death, Dog death, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mourning, Short One Shot, Vets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 13:03:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9072820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aguacate/pseuds/aguacate
Summary: After 17 years by his side, Makkachin dies and leaves Viktor heartbroken. While he might feel lost, he has more support than he, at first, realizes.





	

Viktor petted Makkachin’s collar. He felt the leather, now cold from being without any contact, left in a vet’s table. He sighed, remembering how many times he took it off to wash him, or to try new collars. He tried different materials, colours, textures. But that collar was always their favourite.  
  
“I’m so sorry, Viktor” he could hear Yuuri’s voice, distant. He felt his fiancé’s hand in his back, pushing him close. Leaning into his shoulder, Viktor sighed, trying to say something. “I know you miss him a lot.”  
  
He just nodded, getting closer to Yuuri, craving affection and warmth. He used to hug Makkachin all the time, especially when he was feeling vulnerable and sad. He found peace and a safe space with his dog, and now, he had to accept that it was gone.  
  
“I just…” Viktor felt a ball grow in his throat, as a warning. He took a deep breath, trying to stay calm, not wanting to worry Yuuri. “I… I feel… I feel lost.”  
  
It was a year after their first Grand Prix together, and as much as he knew that it could happen, it hurt how he had to lose Makkachin just when his life was taking a turn for the better. He just started living with the man he loved, and there was nothing, absolutely nothing that he loved more than waking up to both in bed, sleepy and lazy as they were in the mornings. It all started with him moving less, being too quiet, too calm. At first, Viktor wanted to think it was just age, because at the end, he was already old. But then, he started to even refuse to move, and looked in pain every time he walked. Then, the diagnosis came. They told him it was usual for poodles to develop this type of illnesses, and because of his age, they weren’t totally sure he was going to make it.  
  
The next months were hard, trying to find the best vets, those who were willing to fight for an older dog’s life and those who seemed qualified enough to take care of Makkachin in Viktor’s eyes. And when they finally found one that satisfied all of his exigencies he had to see Makkachin slowly fade away.  
  
“I know. He was a great companion” Yuuri said, making Viktor smile briefly. “I remember the first time I met Makkachin, he just jumped at me, greeting me very warmly. Just like a certain someone.”  
  
Viktor pulled away from Yuuri, looking him straight in the eye and smiling.  
  
“Well, first of all, you were the one that greeted me first, and warm is an understatement…” Viktor answered, making Yuuri blush. “And of course he did! I talked to him about that Japanese skater so much, while waiting for you to make any signs of being alive, so he was eager to know you!”  
  
They laughed, for a while. But as soon as the funny thought ended, the pain of losing his best friend came to surface again. He felt he could choke on tears, and he really didn’t want to cry in a vet’s office. It hurt, but he didn’t want to, he couldn’t.  
  
He looked down at the collar, remembering the feeling of hugging his dog to put it on. The warmth of his skin. The smell of the shampoo and the texture of his fur. He closed his fist around it, shaking. He really didn’t want to cry inside. He really didn’t. But then  
  
“Yuuri, are you crying?” he said, hearing how his fiancé’s breathing went weird.  
  
“I’m sorry... I just, I’m sad and I… I can’t stand seeing you like this, I really don’t. I wanted to stay strong for you but, I just can’t.”  
  
Viktor laughed sadly, not being able to look up. He knew that as soon as he saw Yuuri’s face, he would break. For a brief moment, he wanted to. He wouldn’t be the only one, at least, but a feeling of shame run across his mind, and made him silent, immobile.  
  
“Don’t apologize…” he held his hair up, trying to catch his breath, looking at Katsuki’s hands. “I just miss him a lot. He is not just a dog… He wasn’t just a dog.”  
“He has never been just a dog. He’s been with me for almost two decades, and, Yuuri… I’ve been lonely, and Makkachin was always there. He didn’t see me as the perfect figure skater, he just saw… me. He didn’t want me to be perfect, to impress. He was agape.”  
  
He laughed, and he could hear how Yuuri also did through his tears.  
  
“I… I just don’t know what I would have done all these years without him, and I’m worried now.”  
  
He looked up, directly at Yuuri, feeling tears in his eyes. He wouldn’t cry in public, he promised, he didn’t want to. And at least Yuuri stopped, even if he still had red eyes and tear streaks.  
  
“I know, and I’m sure it hurts, but you won’t be alone this time,” Yuuri said, before taking a pause to make sure he was not going to butcher the next word. “Viten’ka…”  
  
“Wait… How do you know?” Viktor smiled slightly, surprised at how he was just called. That name made him want to cry.  
  
Yuuri just shrugged shyly, and looked at Viktor with a fond smile.  
  
“Yurio told me to call you that, he said it’d cheer you up.”  
  
Viktor’s face opened, feeling the ball on his throat unfold. He couldn’t hold it anymore. Tears came out, and he sobbed, burying himself in Yuuri’s arms. He felt sad, he felt lost. But for once, he didn’t feel lonely at all.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This is my first proper fanfic, and my first time writing in a long while, so I really hope you enjoyed IT. As this is, sort of, a request you can send me other ask for fanfics at my tumblr lesbianspoonie, and also come talk to me about it.


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